a few weeks ago i was deliberating where i was in this life. i kept asking myself “what is going to light my fire?”
like most of us, i contemplated my path …i waffled, wondered and wavered. conversations rewound themselves and replayed. amidst the questions and qualms i found myself taking a step back. i gave myself permission to take things day by day, moment by moment.
what was going to light my fire? and at the precipice of this chasm, when i was wading into a sea of doubt, i realized my fire was lit. the burning embers were smouldering, not dying out, not gone, but burning steadily waiting to be fanned.
the deliberations and the examinations are part of the journey. the thoughts zinging in my head are contemplative, explorative and suggest the tides of change are coming. i’m embracing this time–this is not tumultuous instead it’s a ‘shake-up.’
right now i am stoking the embers. i am sure the fire is coming.
have you ever faltered before you’ve flown?
i’m sipping my wine on the couch this evening, while my 3.5 year old is savouring Monster Math. out of the blue he says “your bootiful mamma.” those 3 words broke my heart wide open. i hope he still feels that way when he’s 25. but right now, in this moment i’ll cherish those words.
today on this mothers day, the sun shone bright, very bright and i saw a few more laugh lines. lines which i have to admit aren’t going anywhere so i’ve decided they kinda suck. those lines don’t make me feel beautiful but those three words did. i guess that is the beauty of children they keep you humble, and they teach you–maybe a little more than you teach them.
revelling in the sweetness and surety of his compliment i though of all the amazing mothers i know. women who are a kaleidoscope of todays motherhood–a blend of old and new. they are the ones who tuck there kids in, put band aids on their scrapes, hold them tight until they need to let them go all while encouraging, inspiring and igniting the fire in their children, that same fire that burns within them.
these are the mammas who are working full-time but are still picking their kids up every day at 3:30, they are taking culinary classes and running marathons, returning the mat leave subsidy because they were dipping their toes in their profession whilst on their leave. they are the ones buying businesses and revamping them while cruising in their convertible–carseats safely strapped in the back …and then there are the throwbacks. those who skip out on their career to hang with their kids. they worked out where they want to be and decided to bench themselves for a while. they hung up their high heels and Prada to just be.
today i saw a myriad of mothers…the sassy and sweet grandmothers, the lululemon ponytailed moms patrolling the playground, the the scores of expectant moms revelling in what was to come and one of my favourites the fashion fierce mamma shepherding superman off the playground in her Gucci heels. for all the differences there was a lot of the sameness–mammas are amazing, they are powerful and the pride they have in their children is immeasurable.
whether we’ve taken on the role of mamma, are trying to take it on, or sagely decided to take a pass…we can take a moment to respect the role of motherhood. mothers should be treasured everyday, but in case they are not, let’s take moment to thank the mother or mothers who’ve gotten us where we are today.
to all the mamma’s i know, remember you are beautiful.
It is as west coast as it gets, next stop Japan…so it’s best to avoid the riptides. It’s throw back to simpler times…cell service is spotty but you really don’t care. Phones are tucked away and turned off. People are just hanging out, staring at wide open waves and watching the wetsuits rise and ride a wave, even if only for the briefest of moments.
Strangers tune into each other and talk. Children make fast friends. A stretch of sand as far as the eye can see, captivates young, small, tall and old…and every now and then when you are just chilling out on the beach with the sand and the surfers you might even meet a parrot. It’s Tofino time..and believe me it is a magical place.
Is there a place where you can just let your hair down and chill?
writing thoughts, stories, feelings and words can be considered courageous and maybe a little brave, or perhaps the anonymity of sharing is what allows the inner narcissist to come tumbling to the surface?
but the other day i was gifted with a little sparkle in my days. apparently he words that i impress on these pages made someone laugh and she nominated me for a “kreative blogger award.” Thank you Aimee of the Burned Hand–oh the name sounds a bit dangerous…but it is heartfelt, much like Aimee’s writing which is optimistic, honest and earnest.
so i made her laugh and got something special for my efforts–an award with elusive origins but admirable nonetheless. the rules…
- You must thank the person who gave you the award.
- You must list ten facts about yourself.
- You must tag other bloggers to nominate them for the award and let them know you that you’ve nominated them.
the thank you and paying it forward part is pretty straightforward, but the 10 facts, well i think that is just a clever way to get people to spill. maybe it should be the Klever award?
so here are 10 things about me:
1. i savour my first sip of coffee every morning…
2. i love shoes
3. i’m not funny, but i am happy to have others laugh at my escapades
4. i love the smell of fresh rain
5. i talk a lot
6. i love being outside doing something
7. i took up mountain biking, but like going up rather than down…this is an anomaly believe me
8. sometimes when i am driving i don’t believe i am here–in my head i am still 17 driving my VW
9. i ♥ my family — thank goodness they put up with me…although my sister just moved cross country and out of country?
10. i’m glad i am here…it’s different than i thought but that is the fun of it all
so who inspires me, or makes me smile? well these ladies do. (yes, ladies you rock)
100things100days – a minimalist in the making but who is crawling out of the clutter
pithypants – funny, funny
observing ourselves observing – inspiring!
andrealeber – yoga on and off the mat –i like it
so to my fellow bloggers, keep sharing and inspiring. i appreciate the reads and comments.